Friday
Prague
The Bitch is Back.Prague (Praha) was enchanting. . Despite the recent boom in tourism, the city still feels somewhat unspoiled. If you ignored the countless McDonalds and dreadful souvenir shops , it was like going back in time to a romantic, almost gothic era. A time when buildings were built with passion and beauty in mind.
This photo of me and mother dearest (I cut her off) was taken on a trip up the river. I usually don't go in for the whole tourist trip thing but this was worth putting my snobbery aside. The views of Charles Bridge, the castle and of the city as a whole were breathtaking. Hell it must of been good - this is the only known photo of me actually smiling!
Me reverting to my pre extensive and expensive dental work, when I had to smile with my mouth covered- to minimize the risk of mentally scaring small children for life. (my teeth were really REALLY bad)
Another touristy photo courtesy of my father. What was I thinking, my whole look is somewhat questionable. But despite not looking my best (understatement of the year) I cant resist a man in uniform.
I want to join the Czech army, Czech out the bit of butch above.
Paying a little too much attention to my ice cream. 35degrees all week.The only thing I didn't care for was the food. It was true peasant food, bland cheap and fucking crap. One day we ate at relatively good restaurant, set in an old courtyard, very nice setting. For starter I ordered "Meat Roll" which I was assured was a popular Czech dish. What I received was a piece of ham rolled up and filled with squirty cream. What the fuck. This must be Prague sweet n sour. I literally pissed my self with laughter, to the point where I think I offended the owner and several local diners. I couldn't physically look at the dish with out breaking out in a fit of giggles. Main course- although it didn't have a comedy angle, wasn't much better.
One place which I adored was the nameless club on Karlovy Lazne, directly next to Charles bridge. It is the biggest nightclub in eastern europe with its five floors of drunken debauchery. Me and my brother arrived around midnight and partied till 6am. The top floor where we spent most of the night dancing like demons played a mixture of heavy club classics and future tunes. My favorite feature in the club was a 20ft high statue of an alien on a crucifix which had red laser's coming out of its eyes, directly above him was the DJ (GOD is literally a DJ)
Even though I spent most of the week drunk and flirty the only bit of action/attention I received all week was from Prague's airport security. Despite not setting off the metal detector, this very attractive customs man decided to frisk me, paying a considerable amount of attention to my nether regions. The filthy bastard was loving it, he kept sliding me cheeky smiles everything he groped my ass. Not that I was complaining. My only regret was that he didn't strip search me.Well its back to UK with a bang. Mr S is in the UK I believe, which means party time. Plus I have just heard that my spiritual home for the past 3years is closing down. With the final party on saturday. I just need to work out how to find the money to go out (I spent a small fortune in Prague).
Thats it for now. Im off to the spa for a swim, jaccuzi and steam to remove all traces of the week from my tired looking skin.
Later Bitches.x