Saturday
Miss E
A Festive Message to Miss E.
Hello my dear, how the devil are you. It was good to hear from you on Christmas day, only wish I had been awake to take the call (dam xmas eve hangover), but a voice mail was definitely the next best thing.
The guys and my brother send their love, as do I (even though were sick with jealousy).
I hope your loving you life down under, and that you keeping the guys in check (they wont know whats hit them), and that you drinking for the both of us, I know I am.
Harrogate's not the same with out you, and I mean that. I thought id post my two fave pics of us, for nostalgias sake.
Have a fabulous new years, have a drink from me on the beach and ill see you soon-ish (will be a gloriously long night with 7months worth of gossip to catch up on). Ill be thinking of you when big ben starts its chime.
Kisses.Edd.xx
Posted by Edd at 30.12.06
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Friday
Sales Frenzy
The public are shopping like they've never shopped before, the whole of Britain is in a sales shopping frenzy, this years post Christmas spending has already hit record levels and it is showing no sign of slowing down.Plastered all over the media are shots of people queuing through the night (sad fuckers) in order to save a a fiver (10bucks) of some crappy jumper which is most definitely soo last season.
I mean look at the pictures of the queue for opening day of the Selfridges. I still cant believe that 
Foraging for discounted shoes in Selfridges, London. Who says glamour is dead.
Personally I wouldn't be seen dead in the Sales. I did try it once, three years ago and it didn't exactly go to plan.You see I got into a fight, with stocky middle aged woman over the last heavily discounted Prada (mans) coat, which may add wasn't much to look at. What came over me I'll never truly know, I must have got carried away in the shopping madness, either that of Harvey Nicks were pumping a deadly mixture of vaporised Stella Atrois and crack cocaine through the air conditioning. Either way it was a savage spectacle, of modern day mans demise.
Well, It started with a heated debate, progressed to an exchange of vindictive verbal abuse and I'm afraid to say it ended with numerous display Gucci sweaters being thrown and handbags being used as weapons.
It was possibly one of the lowest points of my life, yet it still brings a smile to my face. Anyway after that day I vowed never to enter the sales again.
Posted by Edd at 29.12.06
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Tuesday
New beginnings
Christmas always leaves a sour taste in my mouth. One one hand I'm very fortunate, I have family, some friends and a good standard of living. But the holiday season always reminds me of the one thing I don't have, and that can't be made better with yet another over priced gift.This year I've had my fair share of male attention. However I seem to attract the guys with short attention spans. Or maybe I'm like a Christmas present, full of promise and excitement, but once you rip off the wrapping paper I am only capable of holding interest for a very short period of time. Yes one night stands can be fun, and yes they can satisfy the soul if only for a brief moment, but its not enough. I'm looking for more. In fact I'm tired of looking for more. People keep saying to me things like "don't worry your time will come"...... but when? I've been single now for the best part of my life. I'm to turn 23 in less than 2 months and the most meaning full relationship I've had in the past 7 years has been with my Amex.
Hardly the greatest love story ever told.
Back when I was 18 and mostly still hiding in my walk in wardrobe I was a cashier for a bank. I worked alongside a guy called Rob aged 23, living in a smallish town he was the first gay guy I had ever really got know. I don't think he liked me very much but I always looked up to him, for his openness and pride. Something which to this I'm still working on, the openness that is, to the outside world I'm very much a tightly closed book. After 6 months of working together I found out he was moving to Brighton. I was furious, my only link to the gay community I craved was leaving. I was also sad, for I was loosing a friend, although at the time I never told him any of this, like I never told him I was gay. I couldn't understand why he was leaving town, I felt that he was running away, taking the easy option.
This festive week I realised why he left. He had to leave, not to run away, and certainly not to take the easy option. Now Ive reached his age I feel exactly the same as he did back then. Its not the town that drove him away, it was lonileness. He realised, like I just have that the chances of finding a lasting relationship in this town are very slim. If by chance Rob you ever come across this blog I apologise.
But its not all been bad, we found out that the parentals have bought a house on Portugal's Algarve. Plus my neighbour has invited my brother and myself to spend another 2 weeks sailing on his boat this summer. Add that to Ibiza and that's a minimum of 3 holidays sorted before the new year has begun.
Posted by Edd at 26.12.06
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Naughty or Nice?
Looks like Santa believes in forgiveness. Not a lump of coal in sight.Here are obviously my most treasured presents.
Posted by Edd at 26.12.06
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Friday
Amsterdam Xmas 06
Bitches, call your doctors and pharmacists and cancel you Xanax prescriptions.......I'm back.Amsterdam, city of sin, land of lust, the shrine to debauchery, has been my home for the past week and it proved to be a great host. Amsterdam and I were made for each other.
I was staying at what I was led to believe was a very exclusive hotel, so I did what any pretentious 22 year old wanna be, would do and took a limo from the Airport to my hotel.
Before you start imagining me stepping into some Karen Walker style vehicle I have to disappoint. It was a Mercedes limo, which as anyone who's used them before would know that they're basically glorified long cars.Watch the vid...
Now I was hoping for complimentary Ferrero Rocher's and the jingle, but I had no such luck. I always thought all limos had Ferrero Rocher's fitted as standard. Maybe its only in Rolls.
Anyway I wanted to make an entrance after all if the doorman sees you arrive in style he makes sure your looked after during your stay, hoping for that big tip. Well I needn't have bothered, I could have turned up in a fucking Tut Tut and It would still look extravagant.
There was no grand hotel, no regal façade, and no fucking doorman. It was like turning up to the "opening of a fridge" in a limo and ball gown. I was disappointed to say the least. This allegedly 4star hotel was no more than a B&B, one can only assume that the star rating in Amsterdam work in reverse order. On checking in, the "Hotel" owner said with such pride that I had the best room in the "Hotel".
Best Room? Best for what? Best use of a small space? Best of a bad situation?
Look at my fucking "room", its hardly a suite at the Palace. If this is the best, I'd hate to have seen the other god forsaken rooms.
But you gotta look at the bright side, the location was fantastic away from the touristy rabble in the exclusive part of the city. And the views from my room were inspiring, looking over the canals. It gave me a real feel for the place.
Anyway I figured the best way to forget that you staying in a very well located shit hole is by channelling your inner Eddie and Pats, and everyone knows the only way to do that is through the medium of Stoli.
A little camwhoreing after a few Stoli Amaretto Redbulls and several Heinekens.
Amsterdam really is a surprising place packed full of contradictions, from the garish red light district to the quaint sophisticated art galleries, it really is the tale of two cities, the outlandishly seedy on one hand and the understated chic on the other, with everything else catered for in between. Its a place which one day I could happily call home. 
If I did move to Amsterdam I would have to rework my life's mantra, people don't drive here, everyone cycles everywhere. "I don't pedal, I'm pushed" is possible, but it doesn't quite have the same ring to it, and it also brings up images of the disabled being pushed around, which is never a good thing. Even Gucci mommas cycle, dressed all in black and tweed clutching their Gucci and LV bags tightly as they cycle by.
I did for one minute consider doing the full Brit abroad routine. You know, gain 20 pounds, dress in council estate chic, queue up for museums, visit crappy famous places, eat at MacDonald's, drink in "Irish pubs" etc etc, but then I though fuck it, you've seen one museum you've seen them all. Then I remembered I'm not a man of the people, I don't do the things which they do, I set my own standards and live by my own rules (which I make up as I go along), besides I forgot to buy a guide book, I don't queue, and I believe that the BigMac is gods answer to population control.Insidethegaygate Statute:
IS GOOD: Shopping, debauchery, stoli, class A drugs, D&G.
IS BAD: Burberry, man-made fabrics, chavs, bumbags (aka fanny packs)
So basically I spent the week barhopping, clubbing, shopping, and .......
I found a bar called Ghetto which serves the now infamous Ab Fab cocktail the Stoli Boli and at only $10 a pop. I even got RSI, a Repetitive Shopping Injury (hurt my foot traipsing through too many shops), I drank enough to sink a canal boat and I met some interesting people.
Good times.
There was one distressing moment. When I saw this poster I almost fell to my knees clutched my face and cried to the sky "Whyyyyy?" . One of my favourite DJ's of all time is playing Amsterdam on the Day I fucking leave. Proof again that there is no god.
One thing I didn't try was the coffee shops, they just looked so tacky, more of a tourist trap than a place to chill. Not that I'm against drugs, far from it I just cant be bothered with smoking the weed, been there done it, designed and modelled the paranoia T-shirt. 
Guess what, busy old me also had not one but 2 holiday romances. I can now add Brazilian and Dutch (OMG....) to my growing list of International Lovers. I swear on the life of Dolce and Gabbana I must have been chatted up about 100 times over the few days.
Why is that?
In England, the cesspit of a country I unfortunately call home I never get asked out, in fact people don't look at me twice never mind flirt with me, but the second I get on a plane out of here all that changes, maybe I'm just an international only lover. Maybe its the exotic factor? Who fucking knows, what's certain is that I definitely need to travel abroad at every given opportunity - for my libido's sake.
What I enjoyed most about the trip was not the vibrant nights out on Amsterdams gay and Str8 scenes, not the endless days of boutique hopping shopping and most definitely not the food (the Dutch can NOT cook for shit). It was the time alone. I had some much need me time, a chance to get lost in a new city and also in my own thoughts. It helped to clarify some things which I already knew and some which I didn't. One thing is that I really have to leave Harrogate soon, but that this time I must do it right, with style, grace and plenty of cash, otherwise I run the risk of it ending like all my other failed Harrogate escapes - back where I started behind Harrogate's invisible bars.
Anyhow, if you get the chance you simply must go and explore Amsterdam for yourself, there really is something to capture everyone's imagination. For me, its a brilliant example of how a city should be, its sophisticated, chic and tacky whilst being healthy, relaxed, open and safe. Its just a shame that more places havent followed in Amsterdams successful, liberating footsteps.
Posted by Edd at 22.12.06
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Monday
Vacation Time
Its vacation time see you in a few days. Wish me luck.xxx
Posted by Edd at 18.12.06
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Sunday
So I have now recovered from the frivolities of Friday night. Mr S (see the subtle bauble pic below) was visiting from sunny Spain. We took in the usual haunts and sampled the delights of the towns latest addition to its already bursting bar scene. It has the classic mix of decadent design and $10 cocktails, the Mojito's being the best in town, even if they do take 20 minutes o make. One things for sure its definitely the new pace to be seen. We ended the night in old faithful Moko lounge, where we found to my disgust that since Miss E's departure to Oz we are no longer automatically on the guest list, however a little persuasion from Miss F ensured we were pushed to the front of the queue and admitted for free. I tell you its a good job, any one who knows me knows that this bitch doesn't fucking queue for anyone. The next thing I remember is Pole dancing with Mr S on the stage of Moko..... Don't ask.Strong drinks, the company of good friends and questionable dancing. What more can you ask for.
Posted by Edd at 17.12.06
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Saturday
Far too many Mojito's
Posted by Edd at 16.12.06
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Tuesday
All Alone in Amsterdam?
I need some advice. As you may be aware I'm travelling to Amsterdam next Tuesday, its a vacation for the soul, a test to prove to myself that I can spend 4 days alone in a new city and more importantly have fun.
Anyway ive been considering writing an article for a magazine. This is nothing definite, but if I can put together a decent article I know I could get it published. I have a title" All Alone in Amsterdam ? "
What I need now is a narrative, direction a path for which to lead the readers. You have to understand I've never written anything for anyone else before, and I'm a little unsure which direction to take. Im also dare I say it a little nervous.
I was thinking of going down the lines of ... yeah I may be single, and travelling alone, but in Amsterdam it doesn't fucking matter, blah blah blah, throw in the odd review, a little of my trade mark sarcasm and possibly a little romance to keep the readers attention.Ideas are very much welcome, in fact I fucking demand them. Please leave a comment here or email me thegaygate@hotmail.co.uk
Later Bitches, and thanks in advance.xx
Posted by Edd at 12.12.06
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Monday
Coke Vs Ferrero Rocker (Edd.d Xmas Remix)
Today I witnessed the greatest tragedy in the history of mankind, a Coca Cola Christmas advert without the "Holidays are coming" song. I remember as a child staring up to the TV screen in awe of the perfect Coca Cola Christmas, how I longed for the red trucks which held so much promise to drive through my town and humble us with their bubbly goodness.For all of my life that advert WAS Christmas, it represented everything which is good and pure about the holiday season. So it saddens me to think that the new generation of children never get to see this commercial masterpiece and will grow up having never known the true meaning of Christmas.
So here it is.
I have nothing against change, though I do believe that if something not broken you shouldn't try to fix it. You say to someone the words "Christmas" and "Coca Cola" and they automatically think of that advert, or specifically the convoy of red flashing trucks and that song (either that or the re-branding of Santa from green to red).
Another example is of that other festive tradition. I am of course talking about Ferrero Rocher. Christmas and Ferrero Rocher go together like turkey and gravey. You simply cant have one without the other. For years they have tried and failed to re-brand, one ad campaign after another trying to get away from their original image. But even now 10 - 20 years on you say Ferrero Rocher I say "The Ambassadors reception"
Now I tried my hardest to find a English version, but I never been happier that I failed. The dubbed foreign versions are pure genius.
"aggg Beautiful, excellent."
God I've missed that jingle.
Now this one is pure genius. I swear a TV commercial has never made me laugh so hard. When the signature Jingle starts and the Ferrero's have their grand unavailing will go down as THE best ever moment in TV history.
Enjoy.
Posted by Edd at 11.12.06
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Saturday Night
Miss F, Looks like weve been papped again.
I really need to learn how to pose.
I remind myself of something, but what?
Who says im not photogenic.
Posted by Edd at 11.12.06
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Sunday
Posted by Edd at 10.12.06
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Fuck Christmas
Tis the season for giving to yourself and receiving from others.I swear when it comes to festive shopping I am the most ruthlessly selfish and greedy shopper I know, I spend literally about $3 on presents for my entire family, and then proceed to spend on me me me like the future of civilisation depends on it.
Moving on, there are so many things I don't quite understand about the festive season.
Bad Parental Judgement.
Parents actively encourage, sometimes even pay for old men with suspicious beards to molest their children, they even queue up for the privilege.
Presents from my Grandparents.Every year I get literally a sackful of presents from each of my grandparents, and when I say presents I mean crap. It disappoints me that 80 years of life has not taught them the virtue of quality over quantity.
Each year I am always shocked by the tackiness of their numerous gifts. Its like my Gran got pissed and went on a trolley dash through poundstretcher.
Santa Porn.
Searching google for festive picture for this post I was both amazed and disturbed by the amount of Santa Porn available, I actually had a difficult time finding a picture clean enough to post.What is it about Santa, this jolly old man who takes great pleasure in emptying his sack for the kids. I can only assume that Santa porn is for people who were either a) abused as a child by Santa, or b) wish they had been. Either way its pretty fucking sick, needless to say it doesnt jingle my bell.
Christmas TV.
Don't even get me started on this.
Gluttony.
I don't understand why this supposedly religious holiday has become the poster child for high cholesterol. I hate it when people say things like "go on, have another, it Christmas", suggesting that if I don't stuff my face and spend then entire month of December actively seeking love handles then I am some how a kill joy.
The fact is, my body is a temple. It has taken years of hard drinking and chain smoking to get this thin, I'm not about to throw all that away by eating for Christmas'' sake.
This is slightly hypocritical given what ive just said, however I do approve of Christmas binge drinking after all I drink therefore I am. Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without hangovers, liver failure and the onset of alcoholism.
Mariah Carey.
I hate the crazy bitch at the best of times, but at Christmas I actually want to take a hit out on her. Now don't get me wrong as a gay man I love that song, its practically a prerequisite for homosexuality, but do we really need to hear it played on repeat in every fucking shop and bar across the land.
All I want for Christmas is.........
